The Oscars will always let you down, let’s be clear there. The best they can do is fuck up and recognize something worth recognizing, it’s not by design, but by sheer cosmic force of will. They’re good for getting attention to those nominated, which is why this year in particular stings like a motherfucker. We’ve had 4 years of talking about fixing the problems with the Oscars and we’ve ended up right back where we started.
Visual Effects:
“Avengers Endgame”
“The Irishman”
“1917”
“The Lion King”
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker”
An inauspicious start. It often flies under the radar, but few categories are a “Most” category like Visual Effects. There’s a lot going on here, but very little success. I love THE IRISHMAN and even I’ve gotta say that the de-aging is absolutely the worst part of it and the film doesn’t work worth a damn until they stop pretending. THE LION KING is an abomination, the Disney blockbusters are fine. 1917 was very hard, I’m sure.
NOMINATE CATS YOU COWARDS
Costume Design:
”The Irishman,” Sandy Powell, Christopher Peterson
“Jojo Rabbit,” Mayes C. Rubeo
“Joker,” Mark Bridges
“Little Women,” Jacqueline Durran
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Arianne Phillips
No DOLEMITE IS MY NAME means no thank you. Same for ROCKETMAN honestly. It’s a bunch of the least creative sort of period wear, even if it’s none of it is bad, this is just the very narrow band the Academy wants to recognize.
Makeup and Hair:
“Bombshell”
“Joker”
“Judy”
“Maleficent: Mistress of Evil”
“1917”
Honestly, genuine kudos to nominating MALEFICENT, at least someone tried for something there. A lot of very obvious makeup here again, no way JOKER wasn’t gonna be here.
Original Song:
“I Can’t Let You Throw Yourself Away,” “Toy Story 4”
“I’m Gonna Love Me Again,” “Rocketman”
“I’m Standing With You,” “Breakthrough”
“Into the Unknown,” “Frozen 2”
“Stand Up,” “Harriet”
God what an artistically bankrupt category this ends up being every year. 4 end-credit songs (including one from the movie that may not actually exist [spoiler it does]) and the most popular song from a Disney picture. At least “Into the Unknown” played an actual role in the damn movie.
I would be absolutely in favor of a rule where the song has to play somewhere in the ACTUAL runtime of the picture and be evaluated based on its usage instead of this being the Oscar Raffle Ticket category.
Original Score:
“Joker,” Hildur Guðnadóttir
“Little Women,” Alexandre Desplat
“Marriage Story,” Randy Newman
“1917,” Thomas Newman
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker,” John Williams
I got nothing but good things to say about Desplat’s score for LITTLE WOMEN and Newman’s score for MARRIAGE STORY was strong. I’m sure 1917 has a good score and let’s just throw Oscars at Williams while he’s here.
If the score for JOKER wins, I will kill myself on live television. Just someone screaming at you for two hours.
Production Design:
“The Irishman,” Bob Shaw and Regina Graves
“Jojo Rabbit,” Ra Vincent and Nora Sopkova
“1917,” Dennis Gassner and Lee Sandales
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Barbara Ling and Nancy Haigh
“Parasite,” Lee Ha-Jun and Cho Won Woo, Han Ga Ram, and Cho Hee
No real complaints here. PARASITE deserves the win, but hey, recognize the work here.
Sound Mixing:
“Ad Astra”
“Ford v Ferrari”
“Joker”
“1917”
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Oof, one pity Oscar for AD ASTRA. “Looked expensive, guess you tried?”
UNCUT GEMS should have been here. Otherwise fine I guess?
Sound Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Don Sylvester
“Joker,” Alan Robert Murray
“1917,” Oliver Tarney, Rachel Tate
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Wylie Stateman
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker,” Matthew Wood, David Acord
Sure, I’ll trust the branch here, whatever.
Film Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Michael McCusker, Andrew Buckland
“The Irishman,” Thelma Schoonmaker
“Jojo Rabbit,” Tom Eagles
“Joker,” Jeff Groth
“Parasite,” Jinmo Yang
Christ, I mean, I guess so. Seeing JOKER pop up as often as it has gives me hives, but don’t think I don’t notice you JOJO RABBIT. Let’s just give this shit to Schoonmaker for like…everything. LITTLE WOMEN should also 100% be here, the fuck.
Best International Feature Film:
“Corpus Christi,” Jan Komasa
“Honeyland,” Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
“Les Miserables,” Ladj Ly
“Pain and Glory,” Pedro Almodovar
“Parasite,” Bong Joon Ho
Sadly, work has gotten in the way of seeing movies, but I’m renting PAIN AND GLORY soon so hopefully I can have more of an opinion on this by the actual ceremony. But PARASITE, fuck yes.
Tangent, can you believe it is just now that a film from South Korea is getting an Oscar nomination?! South Korea has one of the richest and most sheerly thrilling and entertaining cinemas, one I think most American audiences would latch onto pretty well, and yet here we are.
Best Live Action Short Film:
“Brotherhood,” Meryam Joobeur
“Nefta Football Club,” Yves Piat
“The Neighbors’ Window,” Marshall Curry
“Saria,” Bryan Buckley
“A Sister,” Delphine Girard
Best Documentary Short Subject:
“In the Absence,” Yi Seung-Jun and Gary Byung-Seok Kam
“Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone,” Carol Dysinger
“Life Overtakes Me,” Kristine Samuelson and John Haptas
“St. Louis Superman,” Smriti Mundhra and Sami Khan
“Walk Run Cha-Cha,” Laura Nix
Animated Short:
“Dcera,” Daria Kashcheeva
“Hair Love,” Matthew A. Cherry
“Kitbull,” Rosana Sullivan
“Memorable,” Bruno Collet
“Sister,” Siqi Song
Best Documentary Feature:
“American Factory,” Julia Rieichert, Steven Bognar
“The Cave,” Feras Fayyad
“The Edge of Democracy,” Petra Costa
“For Sama,” Waad Al-Kateab, Edward Watts
“Honeyland,” Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
Okay, I’m gonna be real. I have a 60+ hour a week job and I’ve had to make some sacrifices to even keep up like I currently am. I haven’t see anything in these categories, there are other people who have better opinions, let’s keep rolling.
Cinematography:
“The Irishman,” Rodrigo Prieto
“Joker,” Lawrence Sher
“The Lighthouse,” Jarin Blaschke
“1917,” Roger Deakins
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Robert Richardson
PARASITE not being here is a crime. The Academy sure does love black and white, I can’t believe anyone went for THE LIGHTHOUSE, as fascinating as it is. It’ll go to 1917, a second win for Deakins, who deserves so many wins, but I can’t help but feel it’s a “wow that looks hard” Oscar.
Original Screenplay:
“Knives Out,” Rian Johnson
“Marriage Story,” Noah Baumbach
“1917,” Sam Mendes and Krysty Wilson-Cairns
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Quentin Tarantino
“Parasite,” Bong Joon-ho, Jin Won Han
Good for KNIVES OUT, the most out and out entertaining film I saw this year, for netting a nomination here. I’m kind of surprised 1917 has an actual screenplay to nominate. Otherwise a strong enough grouping here, PARASITE should win, it won’t.
Adapted Screenplay:
“The Irishman,” Steven Zaillian
“Jojo Rabbit,” Taika Waititi
“Joker,” Todd Phillips, Scott Silver
“Little Women,” Greta Gerwig
“The Two Popes,” Anthony McCarten
LITTLE WOMEN should win (THE IRISHMAN is all acting and directing), JOKER will win because life is cruel and we have been punished for our sins. THE FAREWELL should be here but it’s not because I’m tired.
Animated Feature:
“How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World” Dean DeBlois
“I Lost My Body” Jeremy Clapin
“Klaus” Sergio Pablos
“Missing Link” Chris Butler
“Toy Story 4” Josh Cooley
Kinda cool that so much of this year is traditional animation. One stop-motion and two hand-drawn. Very cool. Big surprise that FROZEN 2 doesn’t make this list, I wonder if Disney thought TOY STORY had the better chance of winning or if it’s legitimate backlash.
But let me go off on a tangent. It is baffling to me that in one of the hottest moments I’ve seen for anime in my lifetime, we’ve had two films from Japan nominated in this decade. GKIDS usually can try and swing something, but they couldn’t get WEATHERING WITH YOU in the running after YOUR NAME is one of the biggest films in Japan ever and received near-universal critical acclaim? Or PROMARE which seems to have been a legitimate sensation in America. You can’t tell me the Academy has looked at FERDINAND and found these films wanting in comparison. This is a strong lineup, but it feels narrow and lazy.
Director:
Martin Scorsese, “The Irishman”
Todd Phillips, “Joker”
Sam Mendes, “1917”
Quentin Tarantino, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Bong Joon Ho, “Parasite”
What is the earnest point of nominating Scorsese and Todd Phillips in this category? Nominate Scorsese and you’ve nominated everything Phillips is doing in JOKER. Except without the thin layer of slime you get all over you from putting Phillips in.
Let’s reiterate again that it is a genuine crime that this lineup is all male. Gerwig is the obvious go-to, LITTLE WOMEN was a treasure and a masterwork made out of a story already told a hundred times. And Lulu Wang absolutely should have been here, THE FAREWELL is immensely rich filmmaking. I didn’t love HUSTLERS as much as many but my god Lorene Scafaria pulled way more out of that movie than anyone should have been able to. And my pick for the most underrated and most deserving is Marielle Heller, who’s done consistently phenomenal work and who transformed A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD from its the most obvious syrupy incarnation into something melancholy and brilliant and complex and gorgeous. Heller deserves every accolade that for some ungodly reason we’ve been heaping on DUNKIRK BUT GIMMICKIER and THE CLOWN WHO FIGHTS BATMAN.
Bong and Scorsese deserve to be here unequivocally and I’m pretty sure I’d put Tarantino on here, but man what a absolute whiff.
Supporting Actress:
Kathy Bates, “Richard Jewell”
Laura Dern, “Marriage Story”
Scarlett Johansson, “Jojo Rabbit”
Florence Pugh, “Little Women”
Margot Robbie, “Bombshell”
Dern is getting this one as a lifetime achievement award. Out of this group, Pugh is the one who honestly deserves it in a walk. Can’t believe Robbie is on here for BOMBSHELL, what a shit film. At least for OUATIH, she does something interesting and has enough to chew on.
Jennifer Lopez not being here is maybe the biggest snub of the whole thing. I get it, STX sucks at campaigning, we shouldn’t have expected too much. But she took a role that could have been just absolutely nothing and gave it depth and shading and expertly put in place something memorable. Can you really not even pretend that you want to see anything new?
Supporting Actor:
Tom Hanks, “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood”
Anthony Hopkins, “The Two Popes”
Al Pacino, “The Irishman”
Joe Pesci, “The Irishman”
Brad Pitt, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Credit to Hanks for getting a nomination after nineteen years. Mr. Rogers could have been such a dull role, but he (and Heller) really go for filling out the character, giving a sense of how odd he must have been to be around, the person under the persona.
Love to Pacino and Pesci. Pitt wasn’t quite my bag, but I get what he’s doing. Sure, Hopkins, I mean, they went through the trouble to get TWO whole Popes. Gotta give them the awards.
And you know what, let’s stop here for a second. Why the fuck is PARASITE completely missing from both Supporting categories? I get that it’s an ensemble movie, probably gonna miss the Leads. The movie is all on performance, the shifting dynamics and the charisma and the lies and the con. You’re telling me Song Kang-ho did worse than Hopkins? Park So-dam was less dialed in than Johansson? Or are you just telling me the Academy refuses to recognize a foreign language performance because well that would require work or require us to recognize the humanity and the depth of non-Americans? If you can recognize the craft, you can recognize the art.
Lead Actress:
Cynthia Erivo “Harriet”
Scarlett Johansson “Marriage Story”
Saoirse Ronan “Little Women”
Charlize Theron “Bombshell”
Renee Zellweger “Judy”
More accuracy roles. Zellweger and Erivo sure did put in the research, I’m sure. At least they managed to get one PoC in here, good for you Hollywood, you did it, hooray. Johansson did a legitimately phenomenal job here, feels weird she’s nominated in two categories, but whatever. Ronan was phenomenal, she feels like the next Amy Adams.
Was it so vital to nominate Theron’s prosthetic makeup to shut out the legitimately phenomenal work Nyong’o did in US? Like, I get it was a funny SNL sketch and all, but Nyong’o turned in a career defining performance and nothing. Hollywood seems legitimately uninterested in black performers unless they’re in a very narrow band and uninterested in actresses in general unless they’re doing something obvious, so you know, kudos for a double whammy there.
Lead Actor:
Antonio Banderas “Pain and Glory”
Leonardo DiCaprio “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Adam Driver “Marriage Story”
Joaquin Phoenix “Joker”
Jonathan Pryce “The Two Popes”
This category could be a full essay unto itself, mostly centering on my incredibly mixed feelings on my favorite actor Joaquin Phoenix winning his Oscar for THE CLOWN WHO FIGHTS BATMAN and Sandler getting shut out after giving one of the top performances of the decade. So to keep it short:
Best Picture:
“Ford v Ferrari”
“The Irishman”
“Jojo Rabbit”
“Joker”
“Little Women”
“Marriage Story”
“1917”
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
“Parasite”
JOKER and THE IRISHMAN have all the precursors. JOKER is gonna win we’re all gonna die the movie sucked it says nothing I can’t believe one of the best years for film this decade is gonna come down to this